What’s Wrong With My Daughter?

Dear Sara,

My daughter is seventeen and has been locking herself in her room. She only comes out to eat and won’t communicate with us. She seems to be talking to someone in her room. She has a telephone but I don’t think it’s been charged lately. She hasn’t had a bath or washed her hair for at least a week and she used to do this daily. She looks at us like we are strangers who might hurt her. This has been going on about two weeks now. I know she hasn’t had any drugs since she in her room but I don’t know about before. We thought we would give her some time to get over this, thinking it might be some kind of relationship problem but we can’t let this continue. How do we handle this?

Dear Tina,

Your daughter need help right now. Her behavior is not normal and she can’t help herself. If you can’t get her to cooperate and go to see a psychiatrist then you will have to take the necessary steps to have her committed to a facility that can give her the help she needs.

She’s not legally of age where you need her consent so you have the right to do what is necessary to help her. It sounds like she needs to be evaluated and prescribed medication to help her. I know this won’t be easy for you


  1. Before you involve professionals, When she leaves the room for food or the bathroom, I would remove the lock from the door or remove the door. That would bring the situation to a head and also reset the parent/child dynamic.

  2. Judy Turk says:

    It would be wonderful to find a holistic MD to find out the cause of why she is doing this in case it is an imbalance in minerals, fatty acids, amino acids, etc or is due to some kind of toxic buildup. Research also shows that EMF is increasing depression and even suicide for folks who are bombarded with wireless constantly. Since most schools and homes use wireless everything, it is important not to rule that possible link out. We had a teenage relative who was having terrible anxiety and could hardly go out. She worked with a couple of holistic people we know, changed her diet, added some supplements and is doing very well now…no meds needed. We are very thankful.

  3. Alan B. White says:

    I would also suggest Tina contact the nearest NAMI (National Alliance on Mental Illness) for support and education about mental illness. Her daughter is right at the age when most mental illnesses strike and her symptoms certainly point toward that possibility. Education, and early treatment are the best approaches and NAMI support and guidance is free. It sounds like an echo of my own journey down the dark side with my daughter. NAMI has been an invaluable asset on that journey. – Alan

  4. Your daughter needs help now!
    These are signs of depression or psychosis. If she is on hormones/birth control pills, they need to be stopped yesterday. if she was given the “birth control” shot, please do not let her ever get it again! You can’t do anything to reverse that for 12-14 weeks, it has to “wear off.”
    Depo-Provera can cause these symptoms.
    Please do everything you can to help your precious daughter get the help she needs.

  5. Have you considered your daughter may have been raped? Drugs for depression are not the answer. Talk to her, make her talk to you.

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