Sexually Active 13 Year Old

Dear Sara,

My thirteen year old daughter came to me complaining of a severe vaginal itch. I took her to my gynecologist for an exam and found out she has a sexually transmitted disease. I was shocked. She is not allowed to date yet. She was crying but told me she went with a boy to his car during half time at a ball game. Luckily her pregnancy test came back negative. She isn’t allowed to go anywhere without myself or my husband for now. How can I protect her from doing something like this again?
-Evie





Dear Evie,

It may be too late for sex education. Your daughter already knows about what happens when you have unprotected sex. She needs to learn how to make good choices. Try to find out her views on sex and love and how much she already knows. Thirteen year old girls often think they know more than they do and often mistake sexual attraction for love.

Cover as many bases as you can. She needs to know about things like safe sex, condoms and the various sexually transmitted diseases. She also needs to know about what her life would be like if she got pregnant at her age (which was possible when she had sex with this boy). She could also get the reputation as “easy” if the boy brags about his conquest. Also let her know what your values are.

Additionally, her partner will need to be treated for the STD so she needs to contact him as well. You can let her tell him or you can contact his parents. He apparently was with someone else before your daughter. You can only protect her for so long. You can let her know how you feel about this and make her aware of the consequences and hope that she will make better choices in the future.
-Sara

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