/Married To A Controlling Man

Married To A Controlling Man

Dear Sara,

I came to the USA eleven years ago as married but my husband started to abuse me financially when I wasn’t speaking or understanding English. He made me sign a prenuptial and he always scares me telling me I will be in trouble and not giving me any access to any bank account or money. A week ago he attacked me because I found a telephone that I didn’t know about that was all about women and cheating. The neighbors saw him hitting me and called the police and he was arrested. Now he wants me to forgive him and not show up at court. I told him you have to take me to a lawyer so you can cancel the prenuptial that I did not sign but he refused. What should I do in this case? He makes the kids cry every day telling them mommy is taking me to court.

Dear Silva,

It sounds like you have married a very controlling man. If your husband brought you here and married you he may have signed the government document I-864 which says that he will be responsible for you financially while you are in the United States. It also sounds like your prenuptial agreement might not be valid if you did not have your own attorney present when you signed. I don’t have a legal background so you need to go online and find an immigration attorney in your area to help you.

If your husband hit you once and you just let it go, he will most likely hit you again. If you don’t go to court he will likely hit you again. He is trying to use your children to get you to cooperate. Try to reassure them that you love them and hope they will understand that you need to take care of yourself. You don’t want them to grow up thinking it’s OK for a husband to hit his wife.

Good luck.