Married For The Wrong Reasons

Dear Sara,

I hate to admit it but I married a man because he is rich. Stupid huh? He was good to me and spent lots of money on me so I thought that I would be happy with him. He’s older by about twenty years and now that we’re married he doesn’t pay much attention to me anymore. I have a two year old and I am happy with her but the rest of my life is boring. I’m pretty sure that if I got a divorce he would want custody (and get it) of my child. I don’t think I could bear that. What can I do?
-Angelina




Dear Angelina,

It sounds like you made a mistake and now you want out. If you feel like your only alternative is to stay in your marriage then you need to make the best of it.

If you are bored what could you do to make your life different?

Have you considered going back to school? You would be closer to people your own age and have some kind of goal in life. It would also make you self sufficient if you had a college education should you choose to be on your own some day.

Maybe your husband doesn’t realize how you feel. Let him know that you feel neglected and wish that you had more time and attention from him. He may be so busy that he doesn’t realize how you are feeling. If you want to make your marriage work then be willing to give it your best.
-Sara

Comments

  1. Hey Angelina,
    I did exactly the same…. married the man for money and (what I thought was) stability. I left when my child was one year old and now we enjoy joint custody of our child. My advice is to have a real think about things. Go and see a lawyer if you can afford this, just so you can see where you stand with custody and financial aspects. I do not mean anything sinister, but literally to see where you stand. We have free Citizens Advice here in the UK, not sure about the US there) But you must think carefully about this and do not rush into anything for the sake of your child. If you truly want to leave your husband, you must do this carefully and respectfully to make him understand that your child is best off with Mum and that you haven’t gone crazy.
    My ultimate advice is that “You only have one shot in life and you gotta do what you gotta do”
    My husband and I have been divorced for almost 7 years and I have not looked back. OK, so I don’t have the money I had, but I have realised big time that money does not make you happy.
    Best of luck to you, and take care… think things through.

  2. Dear Angelina,

    Just because the man you married is rich
    doesn’t mean you can’t do something with your
    life beyond your child and him. Why not
    partake in something fulfilling that uses
    skills you know you already have. You
    would have to take the time to figure
    that part out. It would give you some things
    to talk about and perhaps add more to the
    relationship too. If you are happy since
    your time will be spent fulfilled the
    relationship will have a chance to possibly
    be changed. He may see a new side of
    you for making that effort and be more responsive to you.

  3. Veronica says:

    Are you saved Angela. That would be the first step. Romans 8:28.

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