How Do I Convince My Husband I Should Work

Dear Sara,

I have five-year-old twins. My husband and I tried for ten years to have a baby and finally were successful with in-vitro fertilization. We decided that I would stay home with the babies until they went to school. My old job is waiting for me but my husband insists that I stay home and take care of the twins. He even threatened to leave if I went back to work which is idiotic. I am tired of him trying to control me. This has been going on since he became the sole breadwinner. How can I convince him that it’s OK for me to go back to work?


Dear MA,

This isn’t about you going back to work. It’s about your husband’s need to control. You are going to have to assert yourself and do what you feel is good for you and your children. If you give in every time he says jump then your life will be his not yours. Don’t let him bully you.

Good luck.



  1. There seems to be many pieces of the puzzle missing here. You claim your husband is idiotic. You say he has been controlling since you stayed home with your children. But….you were with him 10 years before that and it seems like this was not the case then. Your twins are 5 years old now and will be starting school soon. Have you talked to him about just working when the kids are at school, or are you insisting on a long day of work right away?

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