/Grown Son Refuses to Move Out

Grown Son Refuses to Move Out

Dear Sara,

My son has graduated from college and is still living at home. He has a degree in History and says he can’t find a job. I don’t think he is really looking very hard at this point. He sleeps until about 11:00AM, plays video games or watches TV during the day and hangs out with his friends at night. He has cut a few of the neighbors yards this summer for spending money. I am still cooking his meals and doing his laundry. I am ready for him to “launch”. How can I get him to take care of himself and move out?


Dear Nora,

You are definitely making it easy for your son to continue being dependent on you. He needs a little motivation to move on. Why don’t you consider giving a time limit to move out. Let him know that he can’t live with you indefinitely and that you expect him to have some kind of job within the month even if it is delivering newspapers or in a fast food restaurant. You don’t have to do his laundry. Teach him how to do his own.

Don’t pay any of his bills or give him any money. The only way he will move on with his life is if he has no one to depend on but himself.

Good luck.