Feeling Alone

Dear Sara,

I am eleven years old and in the sixth grade. I have seven brothers and sisters and I am next to the youngest and I feel lost. My Mom is busy all of the time and I feel like no one cares about me. I try hard in school and behave mostly but I feel almost invisible. I just need someone to care about me. What should I do?

Dear Kayla,

I’m sure your Mom cares about you. Maybe what you need to do Is to try to help her out when she works in the kitchen. This will give you some time with her so you can tell her how you feel. She certainly has a lot to do to try to run a household with eight kids. Your Mom probably needs some time alone so maybe she would like some help with your younger brother or sister.

Do you have friends at school that you can socialize with? You sound like you need someone your own age to hang out with. Sometimes at school there are groups to join. This might be a way to feel less alone. You need other people in your life that you can hang out with. Also you have to find ways to make your life more interesting on your own.

Good luck.


  1. There is a song, ” Make someone happy,, make just someone happy,, then you will be happy too.” She must get outside herself, and help others, like help her mom. Plus, clubs at school , sports, . Make sure she knows that she is an important player on the family team. Sara gave good advice.

  2. Sara, I don’t believe you truly read this childs concern. She stated she is next to the youngest not next to oldest. How is she suppose to help with the younger children when she is one of the younger kids? Helping her mother is a great idea to get some need time with her parent, but she needs to tell her mother and father how she feels. It’s their job to help her negotiate life and not feel alone. I wish Kayla all the best and hope with a little attention and friends she will past this sad time in her life.

  3. Dear Kayla,

    I can only imagine what it is like to be in such
    a large family. However there is a plus side
    to it all if you look. For example, having older
    siblings can sometimes work to your advantage
    and come in handy. You need to find a common
    interest with your brothers and sisters whether
    it be sports, paddleball at the park, shopping
    for clothes, going to the beach or just having fun. School is almost over and what better time to fill
    that time up with activities of interest. Sometimes during the summer other kids go to the
    local parks and play basketball, paddleball
    bicycle riding, and much more. These are
    several ways to have fun, connect with others and beat being lonely because you will be doing
    something you enjoy.

  4. Kayla,

    You need to talk to someone. Try to have a conversation with your mother/father/grandparents/aunts/uncles, someone. If for some reason you cannot talk to one of the above talk to your school councilor or the teacher in your favorite class. Just keep talking to people until someone listens. I can promise you the there are lots of people that love and care about you. Sometime people get busy and let important things fall through the cracks of life. Also, I would say to pay attention to the people in your life, maybe they are reaching out in their own way but they just aren’t good at it. Things will get better, I promise. Congratulations for have the strength to ask for help even though the help you got here was really bad. Hang in there, you are loved.

  5. Granny in Ga says:

    Kayla, you are luckier than you know. With all those brothers and sisters, you will never be lonesome as you grow up. And when your parents get old and helpless, you will have lots of people to divide the load with. In the meantime, find a nice older lady in your neighborhood and “adopt” her as an extra grandmother. Ask this old lady to teach you to cook or sew. Maybe through your church you can find an older grandmother to hang out with. I would also join Girl Scouts and make friends with the moms helping with that. Good luck!

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