Boyfriend wants me to have an abortion

Dear Sara,

I am nineteen years old and just found out that I am pregnant. My boyfriend and I have been going together for two years but weren’t planning to get married until we saved up money for a down payment on a house. He says he’s not ready to get married yet and wants me to have an abortion. He is putting pressure on me by saying that he will break up with me if I decide to have this baby, I really do not want to have an abortion. This is already a baby to me. How can I convince my boyfriend that he needs to marry me so I can have this baby?


Dear Carla,

You really can’t make your boyfriend do anything. If he really loves you he won’t abandon you and your baby. It sounds like he is trying to pressure you into doing what he thinks is best. You are already committed to having this baby regardless of the consequences. It will hurt a lot if he decides to break up with you. Maybe he is showing you that he is not the kind of person that you could have a life with. Would he take his love away every time he disagreed with you? I hope you can work this out with him.

Good luck.



  1. Dear Carla, Sara is right, if this boy leaves you for this he is not the kind of person you want to spend the rest of your live with. I don’t know if you are a Christ follower or not but God’s Word says in Ephesian chapter 5, verse 25 Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her. This means that a man should put his wife’s needs before his. If he won’t this is a forward look on how he will love you after you are married.

  2. With all due respect Sara, your answer is not what Carla needs. CARLA, 2 years with this guy and now your pregnant. If he is truly willing to abandon you and the baby, you do not want that kind of guy and he needs to be kicked to the curb. With that said, he is BEYOND SCARED and the thoughts going thru his mind are huge. Once he start realizing that his world is not ending he should come around. He will also start to realize that he is responsible for another life. BUT if he does not step up and go to appointments with you, help decorate a room and rub your feet:) kick him to the curb.

    One other thing to keep in mind, GOD has a role in this and if your meant to have a baby with this guy, there is a plan larger than everything else.

  3. Doris L Kerrick says:

    I believe you should think hard about this relationship. He is not being very supportive of you. This is a time when you need a partner to raise this child. You should also use better birth control if you are going to be sexually active. Abortions hurt. They kill your baby and you never can forget that.

  4. Dear Carla,

    Congratulations that you will not be having an abortion! You have made the right choice; the people who choose abortion have life-long remorse. Your boyfriend seems to have taken advantage of you; he would dump you if it entails any responsibility! Keep in mind always the ten commandments, which are for our best interests – and live chastely until you find a worthy husband! This is from a woman with 7 children, married for 66 years to my late husband. I’ll pray for you!

    Love, Martha

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