I am having problems getting my 12 year old daughter, Shannon, to wash her hair. She is pretty and has a great personality but doesn’t seem to be interested in her personal hygiene. She will lie and say she has washed her hair when she hasn’t. What can I do to motivate her.
What you need to think about is why Shannon is behaving this way. Does she clean up when she is going to her friend’s homes or is this something she only has a problem with at home. Usually at this age, girls tend to get very picky about the way they look. They are beginning to want to attract the attention of the young men (or a special young man) who are in her vicinity.
Shannon may not be aware that when she neglects her hair or body that she doesn’t smell good to others. Also clean shining hair that smells good is definitely attractive to others. Try to gently explain these things to her. Also be willing to help her pick out a shampoo that appeals to her.
Sometimes when a girl is being sexually abused she will try to make herself less attractive. You should be aware of what is going on around her and see if you see any clues that could point to this. She may not be willing to discuss this for whatever reason. If you suspect anything at all I would strongly recommend counseling so that she will have someone to confide in.